28 April, 2011

We have a new player – Tim. Yay! Well … if he turns up again this week, we have a new player. You know how it is.

Dwarf cleric. I like pathfinder dwarves – ran a dwarf monk last game. Cleric isn’t really his bag (man), but we’ll see what happens.

Congrats to my IRL niece for pumping out her first sprog. I am a grand-uncle again.

We stole an egg, and some chicks. We are not sure that the chicks was a good idea. There was a party. We are in the mountains again. There is a dungeon®. I am excited: it has been a long time since I was in a dungeon. I hope there is loot®.


Back from the mountains. We recovered the Roc egg, and three chicks. His Grace feels that raising three Rocs is a fine idea and will inevitably turn out well. As you can tell from the snark, I am less convinced of this. But he’s coming along well as nobility – at least so far as expensive folly is concerned – so there’s a positive.

In any case, the egg proved a huge hit at some festival or other and brought a surprising amount of commerce into the duchy. Enough for another statue, in fact. We cleared out the worst of the monsters from around Lake Silverstep – some mud-creatures, some carnivorous plants. It all should be safe for the farmers, now.

More soberly, we are addressing ourselves to the issue of these enslaved kobolds. We host a number of refugees from the mountains to our east, and His Grace seems to have a soft spot for the sneaky scaly little things. I know that many feel that slavery is probably the best thing for them, but that’s not the opinion around here it seems.

As we are heading into caves, His Grace has retained a dwarf – a cleric of Irori – to accompany us. An excellent idea. I still use my belt, but there’s no substitute for the real thing, and his magics will prove invaluable.

As it stands, we are camped in the mountains near a cave entrance which – we estimate – quite possibly joins up with the underground complex that the kobolds describe. Tom seems a little more awake – some of my dreams involve exploration of underground places that I have never been in. Rescuing the slaves is all very well, but we hope there is loot.

As always,
Your sister,


24 April, 2011

Encyclopeadia Dramatica is gone! Replaced by some stupid shit bastard SFW website “Oh Internet”. Useless. Whither paedobear?

A sad, sad day.


18 April, 2011

Bevis dropped in for the evening, but didn’t get a lot of game in. We spent a while doing kingdom building, then just as things looked like becoming fun, someone cast “summon spouse” and he was yanked away.
We are in mountains, which is very different from forest and cities. There are not many trees and no buildings. There is not much magic, and no people but us. We travel more slowly, because the shape of the ground interferes with her usual mode of locomotion. The horses cannot come here. I do not know why there are mountains, or for what purpose they were made such an inconvenient shape.

We saw a Roc, but not very close. We flew straight down a long way very fast, but I don’t think that was what she intended.


Not really much to say, again. I can’t imagine what kerfuffle my recent … actions may have caused. Be that as it may, I have a certain old hand-me-down with me that you may have heard of in passing, and I have bonded to it. It’s actually been around long enough to have developed a personality. You hear all sorts of things, obviously, but we seem to be getting along well enough for the moment. It isn’t very talkative, perhaps because it’s been dormant for a good while. I might call it “Tom”, after its initials, if I need to refer to it.

As for me, well, we are in the middle of integrating Varnhold. The main issue is that it’s a fair ways distant. We patrol the lands on the road between here and there, but no a lot else, and so we were looking to expand the areas that we control. This means the mountains to the south of Varnhold and in particular Lake Silverstep. The lake is shaped uncannily like a dragon footprint and this has given rise to a number of stories … or who knows, maybe they are not stories. Tom hasn’t told me anything in particular. If there was really a continent-sized silver dragon making footprints, then it was a very, very long time ago.

Anyway. The lake is home to a species of very, very delicious eel. It turns out that these things are somewhat intelligent – about as intelligent as a four-footed animal – and consequently difficult to catch. Rainor was plucking them out of the water, the rest of us fished all day and caught nothing. It seems that you can catch them with berries blessed by a druid, but that’s about it.

I think it would be a fine idea to set up a fishing resort here, to ban the use of magic (unsporting, you know), and then when the fishermen fail to catch anything to sell ’em grilled silverstep eel (which we do use magic to catch) at a positively exhorbitant price. Perhaps license one or two fishermen to use magic, and tax the catch outrageously. All for the conservation of the species, of course, to prevent overfishing.

Anyway. We headed up into the mountains. We found a nice clearing and what do you know, we were promptly attacked by a Roc. Yes, they are as enormous as all the stories make out. It grabbed Sir Prancealot (who was with us) and flew off. I attempted to teleport to the thing in midair to give Sir P a Feather Fall, but calculating range is tricky, and – look, I wound up plummeting from a height of several hundred feet. I did get the spell off and saved myself, but I was out of the combat.

Arrgh! Arrgh! Guess what my character is wearing on her other hand? That’s right: a ring of Feather Falling.

The thing is – I have a Ring of Feather Falling. Have done for ages. I removed it while getting to know Tom, and just forgot to put it back on. It’s going back on, forthwith!

Anyway. I think Rainor shot the Roc a few times and Rainin – who can fly by the way – caught Sir P in midair. Rainor tells me that Rainin saved him rather than me because he was confident that a) I can take care of myself and b) I wouldn’t have teleported into midair without some idea of how I was to get down. Hrmmph.

Dave missed the fact that half-celestials can fly. This will be … interesting.

So. We’d like to find this Roc’s nest. And loot it. My Locate Object doesn’t have the range, but I’m pretty sure I have a scroll of Create Treasure Map laying about. Someone back at Forth Tuskwater wants a Roc egg to make an omlette, and it will be quite fortuitous if this particular one has one. I have a rod of Extend Spell, so I’m pretty sure we can get it back there on a Floating Disk [900 lbs – 9 hours, 18 hours with the rod]. It will be rather egg-on-a-teaspoon. We shall have to find the egg and see. If there is one.

As always,


14 April, 2011

Dave has prepared a mini-quest for each of our characters, which is DMming above and beyond the call. Very cool. We have done Morgana’s, at the end of which she was awarded an extremely awesome cauldron. I have not posted for a while, but in this interim we have done Seldryn’s quest as well.

To live! To know! To move and act, and to be acted upon. Simply to be, and to know yourself to be. It is the supreme joy – the first joy, a precondition for any other. It has been – many, many seasons that I have lain in torpor. But now I am awake.

I do not know when I was made, or by whom. But I remember becoming conscious, if only dimly. She was unusual among her kind, who first joined her power with mine. We saw and did so much! She departed, eventually, in the usual manner of living things. But from her body she had brought forth others like herself, and so she passed me on to one of these, and he to another after, and so down through the years. They named themselves “Verdant”, and changed – they became civilised, and great in art, but saw less and less of the world. Many of them gave of their magic to me, which I yet keep.

They lost me, or perhaps they needed me less and put me aside. I slept – if that is the right word – until these Daishi woke me again. They would not Know me, save to peer into my memories, they hid me away in a hole in the weave. But then She came, a Verdant. And one like the Verdants of old. Now again I share my power, I Move and Know. And she is – so young! I had not understood – until now, I have only been handed down to a mind that knew itself well, that was old, or nearing being old as the elves account it. This one: it is like all things are new again.

Seldrynn is an Arcane Trickster who was more-or-less banished from polite elvish circles and sent to live with the annuals. It turns out that she is actually a throwback – house Verdant was established by a pair of twins, and one of them was also … sometimes less-than-meticulous about property rights.

Very cool. The original Verdant (call her Zoe? It’s greek, it means “life”) wore a ring. In this backstory, she got the ring from somewhere else, and it was not an intelligent item … yet. Maybe the DM has other ideas about the origin of the ring (perhaps Zoe stole it from some trickster god?). My character’s bonded item has always been a family signet ring. This item is the original ring from which the family took its symbol, so no probs in-game making this the bonded item. The ring is named “Thought and Memory”, and its sign is a pair of ravens – from Odin’s pets.

It definitely qualifies as a minor artifact, crunch-wise (I won’t enumerate the stats here). Now, you can stack effects on a magic ring by paying 150% of the usual cost. Seldrynn does not have Forge Ring, but you don’t need the feat to enchant your bonded item, so at some point I will be spending a lot of cash and adding Ring of Wizardry III (or perhaps upgrading its existing RoW II effect? A little more balanced). But that’s all in the future.

I might make the voice of the item a little less … philosophical. I’d like to distinguish it from Seldryn herself, though. It has an Int of 12. Maybe the DM wants it a little more mischievous. Meh. We’ll see how it goes. And what happens if I fail a will save.

She recalls events thus:

So anyway,

I had been banished for, well, months now, nearly a year, when I got a letter from mother. It seems that Aunt Muriel was running for election, which is as it should be. Unfortunately, the Daishi had found some sort of item from the family past – from an ancestor that had done a little adventuring. Rather like me, really. In any case, any half-competent diviner would be able to recover a number of sordid gossipy tidbits from it, and that would put a damper on the family’s bid for decent representation on the council. So mother and auntie would very much prefer that the item be recovered. Mother had prepared a scroll with a keyed Greater Teleport on it, which I was to activate – preferably before the election.

Well, there was this and that and the other to take care of first – running a kingdom, armies of the undead and ancient cyclopean liches, the usual. But time was an issue, and Jope and Rainor very kindly agreed to come along. We took a week to put the kingdom in order, and another to prepare an item or two (and I’m very glad we did), and then it was time to go.

We teleported to Bath, of all places. The resort town – sun and sand, boating in the harbour, and of course the springs. The scroll revealed its hidden message: the Daishi had recovered some ring that Zoe Verdant (yes, that Zoe Verdant) had worn, and I was to reclaim it. When I had done so, I was to impress it in a seal on the scroll. It was being held in the Dashi holiday house. It’s out of season at the moment, so a holiday house counts as being secure but out-of-the-way. It also means that I would not have to swipe it from under the nose off the dashi matron, which is something that … would be grossly unwise to attempt.

Oh, and we had no more than two days. Cutting it fine, Mother dear, but I suppose it’s my fault really.

So, what to do? We rolled into town. His Grace immediately started spending money and acquired rooms and put Giacomo to work digging up rumours. I decided that I may as well look the part. It’s been a while since I was properly dressed, but it’s a holiday town, so off-the-rack will do. Rainor went exploring.

We compared notes in the afternoon. The Daishi estate was a few miles out of town, and patrolled by a “security” company, which is like a mercenary company but civilian. Private town guards. Rainor could only get just so far before being turned back. I learned nothing. His Grace decided that the best plan would be to hold an enormous party at great expense – it being the off season, there’d be precious little else going on and everyone would be there. Naturally, they’d need some security. I’d slip out a couple of hours before midnight, wander up the road, and recover our family’s property.

What could go wrong?

Rainor sent Rainen with me as we would be travelling off-road (it’s a little embarrassing to admit, but I can lose my way in unfamiliar forest). We dodged the patrols and I got my first look at the Daishi home-away-from-home. A rather nice secure copse of trees. Mother’s enchantment revealed a little more – there were rings of Alarm spells around it. I sneaked in. Getting through the alarms was tricky, but they were keyed to lawn ornaments, and suitable use of Mage Handwas enough to bypass them.

So, you’re a DM, and you build a puzzle specifically for one of the characters, but the player just doesn’t get it. Like, doh. Eventually Dave pointed out that Ranged Legerdemain was an Arcane Trickster class feature. Really nice setup – the ornaments were inside the alarms that they controlled. Only an Arcane Trickster could get through them easily. Would have been even more awesome if I had not been such a thickhead on the night and worked it out.

Oh, and the puzzle was a logic puzzle. Five rings of alarm: on/off/on/off/on/off. Toggling any ring also toggles the rings next to it. I think I came up with a different solution to the one Dave was expecting, but it solved the puzzle in three steps, which is the minimum.

The front door was out of the question. The back dor was very nearly as heavily fortified. So I used a wand of Spider Climb (remember how I said I was glad we took a few days to enchant some items? That wand was one of them.) to approach the problem from the top.

At the top was a door whose security had not been attended to recently. I managed to bypass it and get inside.

Another logic puzzle – they key to which was realising that … well, I won’t spoil it in case Dave wants to use it again. I usually have a beer on game night, but these logic puzzles were making me regret it. There was addition involved.

Down the stairs and into a trophy room, protected by a quite serious anti-magic field. The ring was in a very nice display cabinet (it was quite obvious that that’s what I was after – it had the family crest) which animated as soon as I started work. I rely on spells, mainly, and there was not a chance I’d be able to deal with it on my own.

I forget … was Jope with us for the second sally? I don’t recall.

So I left, went back into town. The party was in full swing but I managed to detach Rainor. We went back to the estate (well past midnight at this juncture). We snuck into the tower and atacked the construct. Unfortunately, the damn thing hit hard. Would have killed us both. Not only that, but as soon as we scratched it a number of smaller constructs came out of the woodwork and started repairing it. What a mess – we had both left blood in there, so any decent diviner would find out straight away who was responsible. There was nothing much for it but to fetch Jope and Giacomo and try a third time.

We detached Jope from the party – he was nowhere near as drunk as he was pretending to be. We discussed the possibility of finding some alchemical adamantine, but eventualy decided that the plan was that Giacomo would stay out of the antimagic zone with a wand of curing. Rainor would take out the smaller constructs and Jope and I would deal with the large one – my job being primarily to not get killed.

Jope had Giacomo stir up the crowd to rowdiness, and he exited to his private quarters with a female on each arm. Once out of view we suited up and headed out. We opted for stealth over speed – we were attacked by gargoyles which were now on alert. I used the want of spider climbing and a couple of invisibility spells and we all made it up to the top of the copse and into the trophy room. Without further ado, we attacked the construct. Jope was bashing, I was stabbing, Rainor was taking out the smaller constructs. Until the thing hit me twice and I was down. Next thing I know, Giacomo was waving a healing wand (never though I’d be glad to wake up and see a kobold) and Jope and Rainor were handing me the ring.

We got the hell out of there. But Rainen was still outside, off in the woods (he hadn’t come in with us, and was distracting the gargoyles). And we were spotted by the estate majordomo – a Rakshasa. Well, we wouldn’t have lasted for a second, and in any case it’s terribly bad form to kill the help. The fact is that everything we had done was legitimate election politics. So Rainor whistled for Rainen, and I proceeded to stall the Majordomo. I told him who I was (they had my blood inside, so no point hiding it), and told him that the ring was rightfully mine. Which was true – hard to argue with the fact that it has our crest on it. Rakshasa set great store by going by the book, you know. They’d have all torn each other to bits ages ago if they did not. he demanded we give ourselves up, I suggested that we’d be happy to give ourselves up to a legitimate authority (I made a Will save, fortunately), and Rainen was a pale blur in the night streaking towards us.

When he was close enough, I declaimed “and here is proof!”, or some such twaddle, and pressed the ring into Mother’s scroll. It changed again and revealed another spell of Greater teleport. I read it and we were out of there. I did get off a parting shot: “My respects to the Matron”. In retrospect, it’s possible that it might be misinterpreted – I really did mean it in the sense of this whole business just being normal politics, and I genuinely rather do respect the Daish matron. Any sensible person does. How she chooses to take it is another issue.

What’s done is done. The scroll took us back to Tuskwater. I had expected to go home, but I suppose I am still not entirely welcome. In any event, I wear my name again. The ring does indeed have a number of fascinating stories to tell about our early family history, and I imagine that no-one would gainsay my right. So long as I stay away from home for at least a few decades more.

What else?

During the party, His grace had drunkenly offered to accept settlers into the forest. Perhaps that will turn out well. The ring itself is named Thought and Memory. He is very old, and immensely powerful. I have bonded my magic to him, now. I may be banished for a while, but I’ll share what I can with him, and contribute to the family that way.

After the election, we spent a few months fabricating useful items for Rainor, Jope, and myself. It cost a bomb, as the humans say, but should be very well worth it. A headband of insight for Rainor – as powerful as we could make it. Gloves of Duelling for Jope. For me: Sniper Goggles. And a couple of wands and scrolls. His Grace made some weapons, including a gift for the Nomen centaurs.

Brett is going monk/ranger, so +6 headband of Wis is the thing. I think Rainor is at the stage now where he has a better AC unarmoured than armourd. Jope made something nice for me … but I forget exactly what and don’t have my character sheet.

Thought and Memory – stats are (without the sheet with me):

  • +2 to Disable Device and (I think) Stealth,
  • +2 to K nobility and K history.
  • Ring of Wizardry II
  • Spontaneously swap Illusion spells that you have learned (Seldrynn is a specialist illusionist)
  • 1/day – implant false memory or make someone forget 5 minutes.

So, no need to choose between preparing Greater Invisibility or Phantasmal Killer. And Ring of Wizardry II – heck: Scorching Ray, Levitate, Scorching Ray. Heaps of very, very lifesaving 2nd level spells. Plus the usual benefit of having a bonded item.

But the ring is an intelligent item, so fun times to be had at DM’s discretion.

I don’t really need my old signet ring, now. But before I put it away, I turned the stone around. I’ll bear my name from now on.

My friends may still call me “Switch”.